Look, breakups suck. I’m not going to pretend that they don’t.
I mean, you’ve just spent a reasonable amount of time with somebody. You’ve laughed with them, you’ve cried with them and you’ve been through key chapters of your life together—and now you have to call this person a stranger.
It’s totally messed up, right?
But we’ve all been there. Whether you dumped them or they dumped you or you got into a weird funk where you were taking a break and then it ended in a breakup (which neither of you ever expected), breaking up is always so hard to do.
Even though it currently feels like your world is ending and you’ll never be able to summon up the strength to go on another date, let alone call someone else your other half, these bad feelings do go away. Like with anything in life, the pain is temporary.
You just have to stick it out. You have to ride through the breakup wave until you reach calmer waters on the other side. You have to have faith that it will all turn out okay.
Because it will, you know. It just takes time.
And while you’re trying to keep the faith, it helps if you can think positively. After all, positive thinking counts for a lot these days. Haven’t you ever heard of the Law of Attraction?
(If you haven’t, don’t worry—the Law of Attraction is essentially a practice where you believe positive things will happen, so they do.)
Read on to uncover 7 good things about a breakup that will help you to feel better during this difficult time.
Good things about a breakup rule 101: A breakup the perfect excuse to hit the reset button on your life. The deep emotions that you feel during this time can help you to put things in perspective like nothing else.
I mean, you’re currently experiencing emotional turmoil—right? And when you’re content and cruising along in life, it’s easy to overlook things.
However, during a breakup period, you’ll likely be analysing everything and anything. As well as what they did wrong, what you did wrong, why you ever decided to move across the country for them when you knew your relationship was at breaking point, etc, you will also be looking at your life as a whole and what you now want from it.
Even though this exercise can be tough, it’s also extremely positive. Why? Well, it’ll stop you from making the same mistakes again and, if you diverted from your original path due to your relationship, it’ll put you back on track.
One of the good things about a breakup is that, with time, you’ll realise that you’ve absolutely done the right thing in letting your ex go.
You might not see it straight away—and that’s okay—but the reason why you guys decided to end things will become painstakingly obvious and valid in the coming months.
I mean, a lot of people go back and forth with their relationships and are very on/off, off/on, etc; however, the fact that you both decided to call it a day means that there’s a fundamental issue with the relationship.
Even if you weren’t the one that instigated it, you should only want to be in a relationship with someone who wants you 100%—not 20%, 70% or even 99.9%. If they don’t want you 100%, then they don’t deserve to have you at all. Am I right?
Never forget your self-worth, because you deserve all the love and happiness in the world. And if your ex couldn’t give you that? Well, good riddance, I say.
Look, I don’t condone the heartbreak diet—but we all know that breakups can cause your appetite to mysteriously disappear for the first few weeks.
That, coupled with the desire to start working out again because you now realise that you’re back on the market, makes you look after yourself physically more than you did before.
And there’s something about people who have just ended their relationships that makes them look extremely hot—not that they weren’t before, but it’s almost like they exude a new aura that says: “Check me out, I’m a newly single, badass mofo.”
Do you know what I mean?
It’s a certain break-up “aesthetic”—and somehow, it totally works.
When you’re coupled up, you naturally put a lot of time, energy and effort into maintaining a relationship with your other half.
However, breaking up means that you have a hell of a lot more time on your hands. Instead of using this extra time to mope about listening to sad love songs, watch romantic movies and sob into a tub of Ben & Jerry’s, you can be more proactive. You can socialise with your friends and family.
In fact, just being around people can help you from sinking into a pit of despair. Sometimes you might have to physically force yourself to make plans, as going down the rabbit hole seems like the more attractive option; however, I guarantee that you won’t regret your choice.
And you know what? Your friends and family will be incredibly happy to see more of you again. True story.
Out of all the good things about a breakup, this is my absolute favourite.
Why? Well, I don’t like sharing a bed with my other half. There, I said it. I’m a serial bed hogger and proud.
Gone are the days where you were almost pushed over the edge because your ex was in the middle of the bed, or they took over the entire duvet on a cold wintry night, or you couldn’t get away from their incessant snoring. Yawn.
Nope, it’s only starfishing from here on out—and man, does it feel glorious.
As well as being selfish in terms of bed hogging, you can also be selfish in a number of other different ways once your ex is out of the picture.
How, I hear you ask? Well, you don’t have to answer to anybody. You can do what you want, when you want, with who you want—and nobody can say a darn thing about it!
You can also work on your independence and what it means to be newly single. It’s time to say goodbye to Sunday lunches around your ex’s Mum’s house (which they insisted upon every week)—and, instead, say hello to lazy Sundays in bed watching Netflix.
I know, complete and utter bliss—right?
Finally, when it comes to good things about a breakup, let’s not forget about the time that you’ve now got to work on yourself.
Due to your newfound perspective on life, you’ll likely have a list of fresh things to focus on. However, investing in personal growth is of the utmost importance.
Let’s face it—you probably neglected yourself towards the end of your relationship while you tried your best to make the other person happy. It’s okay—it’s normal. However, the good news is that you’ve now only got yourself to try and make happy.
You must also learn to love yourself again before you can even think about loving someone else.
As someone who’s been through multiple breakups, my advice is to be you, do you, for you—and the rest will simply fall into place.
For some reason, breaking up doesn’t just make you take a long, hard look at your previous relationship, but it also makes you realise what you do and don’t want from life.
As well as looking amazing, having more time for your friends and family and starfishing in bed, you have free rein to be selfish and work on you so that you can be the best possible version of yourself.
That’s why, even though they’re difficult to start with, there are actually so many good things about a breakup. Ultimately, they give you a more positive outlook on love—and of life.
This is a brand new chapter of your journey for a brand new you, so try to grab it with both hands. After all, the moment might be fleeting. You’ve got this.
Tunic – Motel Rocks (similar here)
Leggings – Topshop
Boots – Topshop (similar here)
Socks – DASH Boutique (similar here)
Bag – Michael Kors (similar here)
Necklace – Tiffany
Lipstick – ColourPop in GUESS (similar here)
What do you think are some good things about a breakup? Let me know in the comments below!